What are men looking for in a potential mate?

Updated: Jul 6, 2021


At sixty years of age, I have met and enjoyed dating many women—lovely women from all walks of life and of different races and ethnic backgrounds. My mom raised me; I grew up with three sisters, was married to a woman for 19 years, God blessed us with two beautiful daughters, and three of my best friends are women who won't hesitate to keep me in check.

Having been surrounded by femininity of all ages my entire life, I've come to this conclusion: I think I know women pretty well! Well, maybe not as well as one could, but one thing I know for sure is this: I love and desire to uplift women and want them all to find love. Are you ready to do what it takes to find your man? Below is my list of attributes I think men look for in women:


  1. Men are attracted to feminine women—ones who are loving, sensitive, soft, gentle, supportive, affectionate, nurturing, and empathetic.

  2. Men look for women who they are physically attracted to—tall, short, thin, thick, blonde, brunette...attraction is a matter of personal preference.

  3. Men also desire respectful women who know how to temper their words—carefully balancing humility and articulating their thoughts and emotions clearly.

  4. Men appreciate humble women who are good listeners and can admit when they are wrong, women who trust and help them maximize their leadership quality with sound assistance and submission. While understanding that women are more independent than ever, men are hardwired to lead and provide for their loved ones.

  5. After dark, men desire women who are uninhibited sexually, ones who trust that a complete man won't judge them on their pasts, for they know that a respectable woman lovingly chooses with whom she shares her body. While desiring a "porn star" within the confines of their relationship and bedroom, a man wants a woman who can bring his fantasies to life with her naughtiness. She needs to be fearless and willing to explore the limits of her sexuality for mutual pleasure.

  6. Outside of the bedroom, men prefer women who bring them peace, not drama, and hope they can turn a house into a home with innate housekeeping skills and the stomach-filling aromas of their cooking expertise.

  7. Any halfway competent man desires an intelligent woman. In fact, most men are aroused by smart, quick-witted women. Don't be afraid to speak up, but remember points numbers one and two.

  8. Like a woman needs security, men want confident and secure women who will give them space to enjoy time with their friends and participate in other activities.

  9. Lastly, we also like motivated women who possess interests outside of the relationship but know how to balance them while being our best friends.

Now, the question is, should a man expect to find all of these attributes in one woman? Feel free to leave a comment.




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